The Long Goodbye
by KaydeeAre96
Summary: How many times can a heart break, before the pieces are to small to put back together? Join Charlie as she fights to hold on to her sanity while the world falls apart around her. Can she keep the ones she loves safe, and will she be able to handle the loss of the ones she can't? In the fight for survival can she hold tight to what she has, without letting go of who she was?


**Story Disclaimer. *I hold no rights to the Walking Dead franchise in anyway. What you are about to endure is a complete work of fan-fiction.***

 **Warning: Character background and slight group development ahead.**

 **Chapter One: Ain't No Rest for the Weary**

They'd been walking for hours. The light fading fast as the summer sun sank further into the sky. They needed to find a place to rest for the night and soon. Soft groans of the undead could still be heard off in the distance, and Charlie sure as hell didn't want to be out in the open when they finally caught up with the group.

"Hey. Look." Nick said, pointing to a large wooden sign for a camp ground. It wasn't exactly what she'd had in mind. One look at the rest of the groups faces though; she knew that it would have to do.  
"Maybe there will be cabins or something." Nick encouraged as they made their way down the old gravel road.

There weren't any cabins. The place was depressing to look at actually. Just a large clearing with a few grills scattered around the grounds. Abandoned tents were spotted about here and there. The playground wasn't anything to smile at either. Just an old metal slide paired with a low hanging set of monkey bars that sat parallel to a broken down swing set.

The Office itself set off to the side. Sun faded canoes mounted sideways against the red exterior. The counter at the front was blocked by a thick window of glass, leaving only a small gap at the bottom. Most likely used for exchanging rental sheets once upon a time.

Stepping up to the side door, Nathaniel tried the handle. Nothing. Their identical jade colored eyes met, his expression clearly asking his twin for an idea.

Charlie shrugged. Honestly, short of breaking the door in there wasn't much else they could do. Just as she was about to suggest searching for a back door, Vince stepped forward, looking at the large window.

"We could probably squeeze Becca through the window opening. Then she could unlock it from the other side."

Charlie's face instantly hardened, as she twisted to glare at the dark haired Asian.  
"You are NOT putting that little girl into a dark un-cleared area by herself! She's only five for fucks sake." She seethed.

Vince threw his hands up quickly in surrender. I'm just sayin' she's small enough. But you're the boss." he spoke up quickly, taking a step back.

Charlie scuffed. The urge to roll her eyes was almost too unbearable. She may be part of the decision making possess, but Nathaniel was in charge. Everyone knew that.

"She's right. We can't do that. God only knows what is in there." Her brother said from his spot at the door.

"I could do it." Sam said, stepping up to see the gap.

"Oh no, absolutely not." She rebuffed.

"I'm not a kid any more. I can do it." he demanded. Sweeping the dark overgrown bangs, out of his eyes.  
Charlie almost laughed at the boy. He was only ten. Still very much a kid.

"If the kid wants to do it, let him." said Astrid.

Charlie's eyes widened at her sister in-law, as did her brother's. She had to be joking. Then again, no she wasn't. Her face was still with cool indifference.

"How can you say that?" Charlie asked her incredulously.

Astrid's light blonde brows drew together as she scowled. "You're not his mother. If he wants to go, you can't stop him." She bit.  
"I may not be his mom, but he's still my responsibility. Would you have let Adam go in there all alone?" She shot back. Almost instantly regretting her choice of words.

Astrid's baby blues blazed, and from the corner of her eye, Charlie could see her brother's posture tighten. His face hardening, into an emotionless mask. Adam would always be a sore spot for the three of them and she should have known better then to bring him up. Sometimes, the past should be left in the past.

"Doesn't matter, kid couldn't go even if we wanted him to." Lexa stepped in, successfully defusing the bomb that was about to go off between the two blondes.

Turning Charlie met the woman's warm gaze with a slight nod of thanks. Lexa was very young. Perhaps somewhere in her early twenty, with wavy dark chocolate hair and matching eyes. There was a light crescent scar that curved around her left eye. Giving the otherwise innocent girl a fierce look. "You're too pudgy kid." Lexa continued, poking Sam's soft stomach.

Charlie let out a small sigh of relief when she realized that Lexa was right. Though Sam was a far cry from fat, he was clearly still holding on to that baby weight. This rounded out his face, and softened his features in a childish way.  
The boy however, did not look pleased about this fact. "What if we broke the glass?" He asked suddenly.

Vince reached out and rasped his knuckles against the window, before shaking his head. "Plexi." he explained to the questioning gazes. The group gave a collective sigh.

"Guess that leaves kicking the door down then!" Nick concluded gleefully.

"Are you sure you weren't into any criminal activity before the world went to shit?" Joe asked with a wry smile.

"Nah." he shot over his shoulder. "I've just always wanted to kick a door in." This drew a laugh from the tall brunette.

With one Blake sibling on either side of the door, weapons at the ready, the signal was given with a curt nod and Nick kicked. It had taken three good blows before the sturdy door gave way, bursting from its frame. The hinges at the bottom snapping. Leaving the broken door to hang at a slightly odd angle.

Nathaniel entered quickly followed closely by his sister and Nick. Wordlessly, the three swept through the main room before breaking off into separate directions. With Nick taking the door to the left and her brother headed right, Charlie made her way down the short hall.

'Huh, so there had been a back door.' She thought as she entered the back room. The room in itself was oblong, lined with large metal shelving racks. Unlabeled boxes set neatly tucked away, looking completely untouched. The only thing that looked out of place was a busted up gun cabinet. Though she could understand that. In the beginning the only thing anyone had wanted was firepower. Making sure that the deadbolt was in place on the back door, Charlie made her way back out to the main room. Her area, officially being 'cleared'.

"Found a storage room, and the back door. Looks pretty untouched." She told them, when both men came striding back into the room.

Nathaniel smiled. "Same with the kitchen. Fully stocked. No biters."

"Man all I found was an old stuffy office and the toilet." complained Nick.

Charlie smiled up at him. "Did you hear what my brother just said? Fully stocked. That means food! This was genius Nick." she laughed, thumping him with her fist.

Nick smiled back, showing off his dimples. "No more spam." he replied triumphantly.

Soon a filing cabinet had been pushed up against the broken door to help hold it shut and the entire group were spread out in the main room. A banquet of cold baked beans, saltines and peaches had been distributed amongst the survivors and everyone was chatting quietly.

Leaning back against the wall Charlie couldn't help but marvel over the people around her. Most of them would never have met had the world not ended. Somehow, through all of the loss, they'd found each other. She'd found Becca and in a way, she'd found Sam too.

With a quick scan of the room Charlie found her little girl. She sat with Sam and Zoey, just a few feet away. The older two seemed to be debating something in hushed tones, while she just smiled adoringly up at them. Becca had been blessed with rich red ringlets that cascaded down her back. A light brush of freckles dusted her cheeks and nose, accenting her green eyes perfectly. She looked so much like her father did, that sometimes Charlie's heart would squeeze painfully with regret.

And then there was Sam. Though the boy wasn't her son, Charlie had taken on the role after things had gone south with his parents a few months back. She felt responsible for him, in the same sense that she felt about Becca. Charlie watched as Zoey reached out to tug on the younger boy's shaggy black mop. Commenting on its length jokingly. He really did need a haircut Charlie mused as her gaze shifted to Zoey herself.

The teen sat crisscross on the floor opposite Sam, chatting animatedly with her hands once again. Long brown hair had been pulled up into a high pony tail that swayed when she laughed. Charlie had known the two sisters since the very beginning of the outbreak almost three years ago.

On their way back to Savannah, she and Astrid had pulled over to pick the two up off the side of the highway. Joe was a fierce, well rounded woman, with experience in the medical field. She'd quickly become the groups designated 'Nurse'.  
In a way, they all had roles within the group. Nathaniel was their leader. A position that seemed to be wearing on him lately. Which is where She an Astrid came in. He was the only thing the two blondes held in common anymore, So when things got ruff, Astrid would talk Nate down while Charlie stepped up to the plate and made the tough calls. Then, when he was ready again, the two women would shift back into their separate supporting roles.

When things got hectic and called for drastic measures, It was usually Nick who said his piece first. He reminded them that the old rules no longer applied. He was always the one to set people strait, giving sound advice whenever the need arose. His close friendship with Nathaniel had sprung up back when they'd both been in training, then deepened once they'd been stationed at Fort Loren together. When everything had gone to shit, they'd met up with him shortly after Adam was lost. It had been Nick who had helped ease her guilt over what had happened and convinced her brother that Becca needed them. In a way, she owed the man everything. Even if he was a pain in the ass some times.

Lee had joined the bandwagon back at Crawford. A place none of them liked to talk about much. After losing both his wife and his daughter to the place, it had been Lee who'd helped them escape the place. And though he'd been reluctant Charlie had managed to convince him to come with them. This had turned out to be a good call, seeing how the man was great with a wrench and could usually fix anything that broke down.

"Hey! Lady Blake!" Lexa called out form her spot next to Vince and Joe.

Making her way over, Charlie quirked an inquisitive brow. "What's up?"

"You gonna pop-a-squat and chat a while or just stand there brooding all night?" She asked with the curve of her lips.

Brooding? Had she really looked that bad? Shaking the thought away, Charlie crouched down next to them. "What did you need to talk about?"

Joe could barely contain her laugh at the look on Lexa's face.

"She's always like this. Don't take it personally."

Charlie's brows crinkled in confusion. "Like what?" She asked leaning back on her haunches.

"Introverted." supplied Vince with a sly smile. "You know, Cool and standoffish."

Charlie blanched. "I am not."

Joe laughed again. "You may not see it Charlie, but other than with them kids, you're kind of unapproachable."

Her lips tugged down as she contemplated that. It was true, she supposed. To an extent anyways. Did she hold herself at arm's length from the others? Yes, But that was only because she did better in the background. It made stepping into arguments easier when you knew how the people around you ticked. So she'd stayed back to watch. Though her goal had never been to come across as cold. Maybe that was something she needed to work on. Deciding to give it a shot, Charlie slipped all the way down. Taking a place next to Vince as she started to unfasten her gear.

"Ah-ha!" Lexa exclaimed, jamming her finger roughly into Joe's shoulder. "I told you I could get her to chill with us."

Joe rolled her eyes, but was smiling none the less. "Technically it was a group effort." She pointed out.

"Ah, so this was a set up hmm?" Charlie teased. Finally slipping the last strap from around her thigh. "You're staring." she pointed out when she caught Vince's gaze on her now unburdened legs.

Heat flushed through the man's face. "Just trying to figure out how you walk around with all that crap strapped to you."

Charlie shrugged. His comment not really fazing her. "I have some weight to it yeah, but after a while it feels like a second skin." And it did. You could see the wear and tear from the multiple straps and fastenings of her thigh satchel on her dark jeans. The thin cotton material of her shirt hung louse too, once the shoulder holster had been shrugged off. She'd been wearing it all for so long she hardly realized it was even there anymore.

"I'll never forget the first time I saw you." Lexa sighed. Her voice filled with admiralty.

Vince laughed, nodding in agreement. "When you burst into that cooler, with that crazy look in your eye. Blood dripping from that death blade." He paused to shake his head at the memory. "I almost wished for the dead."

"Yeah, you looked completely deranged. Even I thought you were going to kill us."

Charlie couldn't help but laugh at that. They'd been picking their way through a small town a few peeks past, when she and Lee had been separated from the others. Charlie along with Lee, Nathaniel and Astrid had all been scavenging for fuel when the herd hit. Corpse after corpse had started to stumble out onto the streets. In the panic, she and Lee had somehow ended up on the far side of the street, with no sight of her brother or his wife. Lee had just about convinced her that they would have circled back to the camp when Charlie heard the screams.

Convinced that it was Astrid's shrill shrieks, she'd bolted. Not even looking to see if Lee had followed. To make it through the thick she'd ended up resorting to her short sword. Which Vince had later nicknamed the death blade. Cutting her way through the first few corpses was almost too easy, but once she'd gotten closer to the old huntsman's lodge, the screams had quickly subsided. Fear had set in, and with it panic spread. She got reckless. Without even checking to see how many dead were inside, Charlie had jumped through the broken window and started swinging.

Old blood had splattered her person as one by one the dead fell. Before the last corpse had even hit the floor, Charlie flung the freezer door open. "Astrid! Nathaniel!" She'd screamed. But instead of finding the last remaining members of her family bleeding out on the floor like she'd expected. Charlie had been greeted by a very scared middle aged Korean man waving a gun in her face.

As it turned out, Lee had been correct in his prediction that the others had circled back. By the time they'd gotten the two new comers back to the camp, Nathaniel along with Joe and Nick were just about to start the search party.

"Yeah. I guess I did look a little off putting. What can I say? I suck at first impressions." Charlie smiled at the memory.  
"Oh my God! I wish I'd have been there. Lee said that you took off and went completely postal. Hacking and slashing like a mad woman." Joe groaned mournfully.

"Yeah well, Lee was exaggerating." Charlie complained.

"No Lee wasn't." The tall black man said coming to stand over them.

"Does Lee usually speak about himself in the third person?" Lexa shot back with a cheeky grin as she leaned back on her outstretched palms.

"Nah. But in all seriousness, you took off like a bat out of hell. The only reason I was able to find you again was because of the convenient trail of bodies you left behind."

The group all nodded good naturedly, all taking secretive glances at Charlie's down cast face. She remembered another reason she preferred her place in the background. Being ogled sucked. And the fact was that even though they were all impressed with her skill with a blade...Leaving a trail of bodies was unsettling. Undead or not. Maybe it was time to shift topics.

"Well I thought it was Nathaniel and Astrid screaming. Let's just move on now, shall we?"

"Wait. Wait. Wait." Lexa said, leaning forward again. "Are you saying that if you had known that it was us in there that you wouldn't have come to the rescue?"

"Yes. I mean no. I -Ugh" Charlie ran her hand through her long golden mane, giving it a small tug to help with the frustration of the question.

"Yes. I would have still come for you. Although I wouldn't have charged in there all half-baked like I did. Plans would have been made. Safety precautions taken." She explained finally.

God this was getting uncomfortable. Couldn't they talk about anything other than her ten minutes of temporary insanity?

"This leads me to ask. Why?" Vince followed up suddenly, his face pinched.

"What do you mean 'why'? Maybe because I'm not an asshole."

He shook his head. "No, but Astrid is." "Oh come on! We've all seen it. Actually, you know what? I don't think I've heard her say anything remotely nice since we got here. Other then maybe the occasional "I love you" she gives Nathan sometimes." After a moment Lexa nodded her agreement. Meanwhile both Lee and Joe had stiffened, looking like they suddenly had a million other places they'd rather be.

Charlie's smile had faded rapidly. Cold jade colored eyes staring intently over at Vince.

"Where are you going with this?" Her words were cool and brisk. The warning that he was walking on thin ice plain to everyone else. Even Lexa had stopped in her supportive nodding to look at the other two questioning Charlie's sudden change in demeanor. Lee and Joe shook their heads at the girl. It was their only warning to stay out of it.

Warnings that Vince seemed to ignore completely or was just to oblivious to pick up on as he continued.

"Like Nathan, He's your brother and you got to take care of your own. I get that. But it was Lexa who was screaming, which means you thought she was Astrid. Why would you go back for her? She's such a bitch. I don't know many people who would have gone back for her. I know I wouldn't have."

Her temple pounded as she tried to swallow her sudden anger. How dare he? What gave him the right? It was Lee who stepped in trying in vain to defuse the situation.

"I'll keep that in mind the next time we're partnered to do a run." He joked.

"Nah, man. You're good. I'd only leave the douche bags. Anyways I'm just saying, the bitch ain't worth a rescue team."

Charlie's calm snapped. "That bitch, is my sister in-law. Yeah, she's a major bitch at times. But guess what bud, she has every right to be, and you're not allowed to say a god dammed thing about it because you know nothing! The next time I hear you bad mouth her, I'll knock you on your ass." She threatened as she got to her feet.

Vince and the others stared wide eyed as she reached to snatch her gear up off the floor. Turning to leave she paused. Vince involuntarily flinched as she turned back to him. "And I don't know what type of group you were with before, nor do I particularly care at the moment, but let's get one thing straight. You're here. Right now you're with us. That means that you would go back, because we don't leave people behind. Do you understand me?!"

The older man nodded wordlessly, and watched as Charlie turned on her heel and stormed from the room.

"Where are you going?" Nathaniel called after her when she roughly knocked his shoulder on the way out.

"To do some inventory." She snapped.

Nathaniel blinked. Looking over to the people she'd been setting with a raised brow. None of them would meet his gaze. Sighing, he headed down the dark hall to where his sister had vanished. Why couldn't things just be simple? Was it too much to ask for just one night of rest without having something or in this case someone, blowing up?

 **AN: So for those of you who are very confused right now I apologize. This isn't a new chapter. Yes, Yes I know. 'Kaydee why are you re-posting shit?' The easiest way to put it is that after rereading what I'd posted the first time I felt unsatisfied and decided to redo it. So if that bothers you, tough cookies. Although I can promise that it will be the only chapter that I end up re-posting. From here on out I'll only post what I'm 100% comfortable with. Again I apologize for my crap-tastic writing. And would like to note that I will be drawing from the show, game and comics, Along with whatever I can come up with on my own. This story is just for fun and will hopefully help me establish a writing style that works for me. Constructive criticisms are more than welcomed but please keep it civil.**

 **-K.D.R**


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